I had a few cancelled appointments this morning, which gave me time to think and wonder... I started to think about why I lift, why I train, and why it is such a large and integral part of my daily life.
Not "to be the biggest!" as there is no way to afford the $20k+/year professional bodybuilders pay for GH/test... Nor would I want to endure the side effects, associated health risks, etc.
or "To be the strongest" That will likely never happen. I've had enough serious injuries from MMA/boxing/lifting already that there is very little likelihood that I will ever crack an elite raw (or equipped) total at 242 (or 275). Besides, there are already people that are worlds stronger than I am or ever will be.
or "To win my division." I'm not overly interested in powerlifting meets, they are fun in their own way, but they're not why I lift.
For me:
1) Pride:
There's a pride in lifting heavy weights. A sense of self satisfaction. Little else is as fun as grinding out 10, 15, 20 reps of a weight that you thought you could only get for 10... or in my case... getting 8 reps when I though I could only get 3 ( I hate high reps with a passion). I train through/around injuries, through sleep deprivation, etc. I hurt, but I lift anyway. I want to sit down after being on my feet all day, but I train anyway.
There's a pride that comes from hauling my 250+lb frame up and over a bar doing 20 strict pullups. I know I'll likely never compete at crossfit, but it's fun to drop into CF boxes and not look like a total jackwad doing their WODS (it's also funny as shit to see me swinging on the pullup bars doing "butterfly kipping bullshit seizures pullups" with a modicum of skill. Hello 3:48 Fran...)
One of the largest senses of pride that I get is after a 24 or 30hr shift in the hospital; having that post call euphoria and crushing weights and releasing all the frustration and aggression... then being so damn tired that you don't know if you can muster up the energy/strength/drive to walk inside, shower, and go to sleep.
2) Health:
“Through the years, I have combined meditation, action, and the Iron into a single strength. I believe that when the body is strong, the mind thinks strong thoughts. Time spent away from the Iron makes my mind degenerate. I wallow in a thick depression. My body shuts down my mind.” – Henry Rollins
I have a stressful job. I work long hours, that’s true, but I also have to have time to be a husband(though a pretty poor one during some months of work), a father (that little doll is a handful), a cook, and take care of my house (once again, poorly!). It is the easiest thing in the world to say “I’ll lift tomorrow.” Or “It’s just one missed workout.” What I’ve found is the 5-10 hours per week that I spend in my garage lifting is one of the most important things keeping me mentally healthy through all of this stress and work.
Iron is my balance, my anchor. It keeps me grounded. I'd be even worse at the other aspects of life if I neglected my anchor.
Weights
Recent 525 'bounce' double deadlift (thanks Steve Goggins for the recent enlightenment regarding bouncing doubles vs touch&go.)
Recent 345 double on the bench.
Diet:
Current wt ~251-253
Pretty solid diet overall, I'm not losing weight as fast as I would like, but I also am not putting in the time conditioning that I should - Life has been a big impediment on this.
I've found and now love frozen 'steamer' bags of veggies. 4 minutes in the microwave and boom -12 oz of broccoli/brussel sprouts; hard to beat.
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